(no subject)

[wandbreaker]

All right, in honor of stories, and a certain blonde, needy young lady, and the fact that I spent a great majority of my weekend being tugged from place to place, here goes.

Once upon a time, because I'm told all great stories start that way, there was a King. This King was terribly handsome and clever, but he lacked in a great many things: ugliness, for one, but more importantly, he lacked in company. See the King wasn't one to scandalize anyone, because then his advisors (of whom there were many, and loud) would yell at him, and he wasn't keen on being yelled at by anyone.

Even Kings can't make everyone do as they're bid just to keep the peace (they call that war, Rosella, just so you know).

And so the King went into the woods one day and lo! He saw there a unicorn drinking from a fountain. Because the King was chaste (and also lonely) he could approach without getting gored (this is a feat for only the bravest of young men, unless you want to ride one, in which case I hear it says something entirely different about you) and the unicorn looked up and sai---

[There's a crash and a yelp and a mrrrrooooowhiiiiiiiiiissssss]

Comments

[wandbreaker]

And he only has one eye.

voice.

[likeboudica.livejournal.com]

Have you neglected to explain this to him?

[derse-princess.livejournal.com]

The single eye is an unfortunate and unexpected element. His colouring, given his name, is rather less so.

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

Some associate of the unicorn, perhaps.

voice.

[wandbreaker]

I ought to think about it.

[wandbreaker]

Oh, the unicorns here are very poor tempered.

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

Their associates may be less so, though, and that's what I'd be interested in.

voice.

[likeboudica.livejournal.com]

Perhaps with proper education he would not treat you this way.

[wandbreaker]

Which associates?

voice.

[wandbreaker]

I'll have to do this.

voice.

[likeboudica.livejournal.com]

I hope it will have the desired results for your sake, sir.

voice.

[wandbreaker]

Thank you, Lady.

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

I'd have to find out, wouldn't I? I've not been here long enough to meet any unicorns, let alone the company they keep. [A beat.] With the exception of you, of course. It could be anyone or anything, although I could always take my cues from fairy tales if I find myself exceptionally lost.

[wandbreaker]

I'm told we used to have many a fairy tale residing here.

voice.

[likeboudica.livejournal.com]

You're quite welcome.

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

Yes, I was told my imagination would receive a lot of exercise here.

[wandbreaker]

Just some. I suppose it depends on where you're from.

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

London -- which, I've gathered, could really mean anything.

[wandbreaker]

Ah, I'm from Finchley.

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

I've never been; I try to avoid leaving the hustle, bustle and general dirt and destitution of the main city.

[wandbreaker]

If you can't smell the Thames you're not interested?

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

It does give me a fairly large berth -- particularly in the summer.

[wandbreaker]

And what is it you do?

[bitesvampires.livejournal.com]

It varies, although I suppose indulging in idleness and anything that might constitute as 'pleasurable' primarily, and becoming familiar with like-minded individuals secondly. What is it you do, besides possibly befriending ill-tempered unicorns?

[wandbreaker]

Pleasurable pastimes, is that right? I suppose you could do worse.

Occasionally I try and irritate normally peaceable and well-tempered young princesses, but generally I make sure my family doesn't end up in more trouble than they're capable of getting out of.